The Distant Love

As we grow older and apart, the relationships call for breathing space so that individuals can choose where to get closer and where to keep distance.

‘Loving from a distance’ is what a friend often told The purple Frog works for some relationships where gaps in mindsets are wide. Individuality and individual choices take a hit if life has too many compromises. All of it shows in the bad quality of life.

And then you think what is a bad quality life – well, where you do things you know you wouldn’t otherwise do (if you know what you want)…else you would continue to be unkind and harsh and hard or even, extra-polite at places where you don’t need to be all of that.

The Distant Love with some you are born with allows for going closer to people and places that you can love when they are closer to you. And The Purple Frog thinks that is Destiny…

How do you deal with those who hold you back in the name of relationship tags or role descriptions… Who think they own you. Those who don’t need you but want you. Often guilt you when you demand distance to be able to love them.

Well, ideally just a conversation should do.

But, some people can’t deal with not wanting to be lived with and then, they play games. And then, it gets tricky. Because your realisation of no love there becomes even clearer and the desire for distance goes up. The hearts are already distant in such settings. The need is only to walk away. And when walking away is made harder, that’s when FIGHT of all sorts happen.

Hearts grow even more distant and one realises, it is no more possible to love since it is only the distance that exists. The ones who don’t let go try to hold you back often with money and objects because that’s all that they have got. And if you refuse, exert power.

Nelly Furtado might have meant to encourage people with ‘Say what you want’.  Unfortunately, those who exert power seem to have taken to that. They say and do what they want and cause delirium of the type that’s unfathomable.

If only, ‘Loving from a Distance’ was allowed for in the beginning and some people were not so empty that they needed to kill the spirit of somebody to fill their own egos and senses.

Thing This Week

Pet Rights in the civilised world where the wild ones are allowed because they are scary and the pet polite. So rights for the sweet.

One more thing…haven’t plants and animals lived together as mute beings forever on this planet. Animal excreta is the plant’s nurturing protein of sorts. Then who are we humans to break that relationship.

And if we own an animal or a plant, do we not just hope that none of them is destroyed. How can I love my plant more than that pet and vice-versa… Nature made them for harmonious co-existence. Once again…humans own each and problems begin. Animals will sniff each plant and do their bit. The plant will continue to wash itself off when it rains. So why not keep both (the pets) indoors and give sunlight when it needs for protection rather than saying my being is more important.

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Festive Fare

The Purple Frog once had a friend (quite like a toad too) who dreaded Punjabi weddings (a North Indian tribe that many say are like what the Irish are to the English). The Purple Frog wouldn’t know since it hasn’t hopped enough in that direction to find cultural similarities.

So this toad friend remembered entering the wedding pandal off guard, how you enter a party with a hope to enjoy a little like a guest. However, he was greeted with – oh wow, you’re here. Good. Go hit the dance floor.’ As he smiled apprehensively thinking it was a mere formal-offering-meets-polite-decline moment, he witnessed shock.

He was pulled and pushed and made to first dance before he could even realise he is in the middle of a stranger crowd of over 200. By the time, he came to his senses, it was too late. He had done his awkward dance steps which quite were like slightly-bent-knee step-touch without stretching the arms…

Before The Purple Frog moves into revealing the details of dance moves of

Many near, dear, distant, and stranger ones, it wants to take the liberty of doing so because dancing and eating are the only activities that are the closest to describing the Indian festive fare.

The Purple Frog itself isn’t

A trained dancer and has over the years seen viewers/co-dancers confused about the mismatched movement of the upper and the lower body. But, nothing stops the dancing feet even if the best they know is to hop.

The earliest memory of

A move worth copying comes from a dear relative. He would flare up his nose…widen the eyes, slightly pop out the eyeballs…spread the legs, bend slightly backwards and hop…after two hops he would run to a nearby dance spot  and do the same…this way he would cover the entire dance floor in four fast runs and turns.

Then there are those

Who have never jumped a stair in life and time just passed before the special day arrived when they have to dance because the occasion calls for. They raise the arms well…straight up in the air but can’t jump. No. Knees bent and on the spot act of jumping without any success. Only the heels go up by an inch. And now imagine such people after a drink. The same movement at the speed of 20 jumping attempts in 30 seconds.

Then a dear friend, toad-kissed-by-a-princess-turned-into-a-prince, twists, twists, twists, goes down, twist some more…the protruding ass is almost touching the floor and then spots a viewer keenly watching him. Forgets to twist and finds it hard to just get up after having gone down that much.

Then the beauties who not only know the song by heart but also the dancer’s facial expressions which can get quite expressive when the music is loud, the dance floor dark and secluded & the person blind to the reality of someone watching them live in their moment of Me-no-less-than-Beyonce/Hema Malini.

Then there are the kite fliers.

They have an invisible string in their hands and the move is happening and their kites are flying, their hands suspended freely in the air pulling that invisible string.

Once again, The Purple Frog isn’t a great dancer and has often been compared to a snake dancing to the tunes of a snake charmer or sometimes even told, that hop, hop, hop was good…lol.

On that note, wishing you happy and fun-filled festive times where you eat and dance like no one is watching…

Things This Festive Season

Compiled a festival special collection for a festive fare nearby…

The Purple Frog | Festive Fare

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The Second Last is IT

There is a feeling in this world that fortunately those who make intelligent, careful choices and those who fear the unseen, never go through. However, those of us who amble about life carelessly may happen to feel it. It is like the forbidden never land where you land up because you were living a certain way (careless or carefree, in the worldly sense).

So The Purple Frog calls that feeling suicide.

And trust it when it says, this feeling is different from ‘Gosh, I wish I were dead’ and go about doing the chores in a dreary sort of way and stress eating or sexing or drinking or working out or socialising etc etc etc.

It is a feeling

That can’t see a solution till as far as the mind can see and no hope till as far as the eyes can see and nobody till as far as the heart can feel. It is hollow. A bottomless pit. A black hole.

Whether or not one can muster up the moment to actually go about planning like arranging for the right/most painless equipment or ways (again, thanks to our non-violent way of growing up and non-American crime rates where we learn how to hold the gun the same year we say no to the milk bottle), the feeling is real.

Well, this is not a preachy post. Hearing stories of people, seeing people live resigned/apologetic lives because of being different or constantly arguing about life choices made by others (while ambling about carelessly/carefree), The Purple Frog hopes to help (if at all) someone from its own experience of turning prey to the thoughts of the same bottomless pit twice.

The first time the thought occurred,

It even took The Purple Frog by surprise. It had no idea that in the very modern set-up of our society those situations were rarely seen or when seen brought defamation and mockery. At that time, a friend, by chance, was around and through a column in his magazine sort of embarrassed The Purple Frog with his take on such thoughts and the feeling subsided because it is considered weak to even have such a thought. Completely forgotten…Compromised. Did exactly how mockery/defamation and all that brings peace in settings we live in. And it was bliss.

But an ambling heart doesn’t know all this. Five years later, again The Purple Frog found itself in a situation where the column-writing friend was also almost hoping – wish you were dead…A bottomless pit once again and this time no one to rescue except for a few SWEAR WORDS learnt but hardly used over the years of growing up. They just helped in keeping away all the friends/family-turned-foes.

The Power of the Second-Last

This is what The Purple Frog hopes to offer to all those who haven’t made some of the best choices or couldn’t live one etc etc etc.

  1. Plan a runaway. To a room/bathroom, to a café, to an old thinking spot in your city, to another city, to the hills, to the beach, to another country. Just find a corner that is all yours in this world. Even if it is that ‘unpopular decadence street’, trust The Purple Frog, land there because it is the Second Last. The last thought has already occurred to you and that’s the world’s gift to you. The Second Last is your gift to yourself.
  2. After all the drama (this will happen, inevitably) and taking an even bigger hit on YOU the person, once you have landed where you can think, go idyllic. As Lazy as the word LAZY implies.
  3. Wait for the day when you smile again. Genuinely. Trust The Purple Frog, that will happen.
  4. Just observe all that made you smile. A naked man/woman to the most pervert joke to the baby on the street to aromatic foods…it is all okay. Learn to smile again and do not forget to keep pushing back those who are coming in way of that smile. From cussing to silence, do what works for you. But, don’t ever use them with those who are already in some pit. Let them go. You will know them. They are in nobody’s way. They are themselves stuck in some pit. Be kind there.
  5. Next, observe whatever left you with a sense of accomplishment or a sense of finding some ground under your feet. It doesn’t have to be the most noted task of this planet. It can be as bold as directing an A-rated film (by finding actors that you don’t force and a country where it is legal!). As forgotten as a sport you quit early on in life or something as mechanical and non-appreciated as laying bricks. Just do and repeat. That will lead you away from the pit.
  6. But that one thing is a must-do for you, you will realise. That’s probably the only way you will remain on this planet without hitting the bottomless pit repeatedly.
  7. This exercise can last longer. It is just the start. But it is worth every bit because it keeps you away from the thoughts of the bottomless pit. Pushing away can last longer than expected.
  8. And remember, The Second Last is not only for the ones that have genuinely felt the last. For them it is urgent.
  9. For the others (not the intelligent ones who know how to live happily without affecting the happiness of others) – those who can go about life by simply feeling ‘Wish I were dead’ & are just tormenting those around – they also can find solace in the Second Last.

The Purple Frog’s Second Last is:

Making, admiring makers, exploring new materials, experimenting and devoting itself to the idea called ART. It also found its Second Last in the innocent eyes of animals, (Herbi+Carni) Vores alike.

P.S./Disclaimer:

Firstly, it takes a lot of courage to acknowledge the thought and perspective. However, sharing it is important because it may help someone, somewhere.

So this post is not for those who are just looking for an excuse to cuss or to make ugly, illegal MMSes  or create mood & settings to lead more people to want to reach the bottomless pit.

 

 

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Imagine.Explore.Create.